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Chris Cleary

Udtm? | Love & Law

Decorative image. Text reads, "The Weldon Times 2024.  Udtm?. Written by Chris Cleary."

Before starting 1L, my best friends, Natalie and James, asked for a favour: “Chris, can you officiate my wedding?” Without hesitation (but with a few tears) I accepted.


That night, white smoke filled my dreams, and as I was elected Pope, I awoke. The prior night’s alcohol slowly left my system, and I realized I may have made a mistake. How could I officiate a wedding? I had never even attended a wedding before, and I was about to have the busiest year of my life in 1L. On top of all that, given the hellish landscape of modern dating, I didn’t know if I even believed in love!


Love, chaos, and law school

With the wedding over a year away, I pushed my worries aside and dove headfirst into the chaos of 1L. Months passed, and now and then I would receive subtle reminders that love and marriage were in the air — and that my impending doom was rapidly approaching.


The Newfoundland government hounded me for wedding details, I would see happy couples holding hands on the street, and classmates would make out at Domus like they were contestants on Love Island.


The rightful king of far, far away

Two thoughts kept me from throwing in the towel – Natalie and James. When I finally sat down to write the speech, I must admit that, like the Grinch, I felt my heart grow three sizes. By the time the ink was dry I was convinced – love was real.


As I closed my laptop, feeling accomplished, I reached for my phone and noticed a Tinder message. Had my Prince Charming arrived to sweep me off my feet?


I opened the app and read the words,

U dtf?

For a moment, I had no idea what this arrangement of letters meant. Had the ABCDs been rearranged to UDTFs? Once I translated the message, I sighed, closed the app, and decided maybe Tinder wasn’t for me.


Happily ever after

I’m happy to report, the wedding went off without a hitch. Natalie looked radiant, James couldn’t stop smiling, and, miraculously, the wedding officiant didn’t burst into tears!


Looking back at the wedding, I can’t help but think that while modern dating can be a challenge (to say the least), maybe, just maybe, all the drama will be worth it. If we’re lucky, perhaps those “U dtf” texts will someday change to “U dtm” (You down to marry?)


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